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If you want to talk your way into government some of what's inside may help - the rest will remind you how easy it is to come a cropper on the slippery political slope!!!
Political Boll**ks takes a sideways look at the things that politicians say. We'd like to say that it ranges from the sublime to the ridiculous, but it's all too rarely sublime and all too often ridiculous. It's full of photographs that highlight the pompous, the absurd, the lies and the frankly stupid things spoken by politicians - which all the while they expect us to believe. Why should we bury bad news? Should there any longer be, known knowns; the known unknowns; and the unknown unknowns? But more to the point this book will expose once and for all how it's possible to tell if a politician is telling a lie. . .just watch to see if their lips move.
Ask yourself a simple question. Has any politician ever answered a straight question with a straight answer?
There was a time when we looked upon our politicians as god-like geniuses; men and women who had a command of the English language that put us mere mortals to shame. Politicians must be given some very special training at which they learn the black arts of talking complete boll**ks, while managing to sound utterly plausible. 'Political Speak' is an art - the art of never saying anything that may come back to haunt you - at least not intentionally.
At least 50 per cent of the population are women, and the rest are men. Harriet Harman
At MP training camp they are told never to comment on the hypothetical, but all too often some wily media type tricks them into doing just that. The consequences are usually catastrophic for the politician and often hilarious for the rest of us.
I have as much chance of becoming Prime Minister as of being decapitated by a frisbee or of finding Elvis. Boris Johnson
Recently the scandal over MPs expenses has raised the political boll**cks bar to dizzying new heights. MPs of all shades, all ages and even both sexes in attempting to clear both the bar and their name have attempted intellectual summersaults of mindboggling difficulty while justifying their actions. Some, of course, have just talked complete boll**ks.
The claims I made were in accordance with the rules, and were all approved by the fees office.
Peter Viggers on his duck house
Then again as someone once said, "politics is show business for ugly people" but perhaps what all that proves is that there's been far too much show business and not enough business being done on our behalf - although many MPs with second and even third jobs may not agree. Perhaps it's this ever closer relationship between politicians and business that has given rise to an increasing number of our politicians sounding like middle-managers (clearly more and more of them look like middle managers).
Anybody who enjoys being in the House of Commons probably needs psychiatric help. Ken Livingstone
Click to see more details on Political Boll**ks.
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